Happy Halloween! We interrupt our regularly scheduled posts from our forthcoming book in an attempt to spook you.

Hoo hahahahaha . . .

 

 

Ghost Jobs

Just months before COVID hit, the New York Post reported that 43 percent of employees age 22 or younger had accepted a job, and then never showed.

The numbers were far lower for Millennials/Gen Xers (26%) and Boomers (13%).

“These entitled young people,” the article says, “are shucking off potential employers like bad dates without so much as an ‘I’m sorry’ or even an ‘It’s not you, it’s me.'”

Gen Zers have turned the tables on employers, who’ve had a long history of ghosting supposed new hires.

“People treat their job search like they would dating,” Dan Schawbel, author of the book, “Back to Human: How Great Leaders Create Connection in the Age of Isolation” (Da Capo Press)told The Post in July 2018. “They want instant gratification. They are always looking for the next best thing.”

 

Fortuneteller of Disease

Look into your algorithms instead of your crystal globe, and you can earn a living telling people what illnesses are coming to get them.

Genetic testing services have become more popular and affordable, as more people than ever are examining their DNA to find out about everything from their risk for inherited health conditions to their bodies’ ability to process caffeine.

Genetic counselors—who generally need a master’s degree in the field—interpret tests and provide counseling and guidance to individuals and families, and Stacker predicts this field will grow with the rise of Gen Z.

Maybe you can hang beaded strings in your doorway and compare your clients’ palms to their chromosomes.

 

 

3D Printing Conjurer

It is in your power to create anything you desire, and from your den of magical control you can design, sculpt, and mold anything from weapons to shields, fashion to architecture, biotechnology to, perhaps someday soon, your very own minions.

 

Poison Taster

If you can’t find work elsewhere, you can sign up to test new drugs. The pay can be quite lucrative, but . . .

You take a few pills, they stick a few needles in you, you get paid, and you go home. But while most subjects pass through trials without incident, there is an element of Russian roulette to clinical trials, says Social Talent.

One observer of a trial that went wrong commented: “They went down like dominoes. They began tearing their shirts off complaining of fever, then some screamed that their heads were going to explode. After that they started fainting, vomiting and writhing around in their beds.”

Full-time test subjects take medications that are sometimes not ready for the open market, endure endless blood tests, and risk serious medical harm.

It’s scary, because you’re subjecting your body to things when you have no idea what they are.

 

 

Pysch Ward Worker

It doesn’t pay well, and it takes all your strength: Being a psychiatric ward attendant means you help patients with their daily needs, such as giving patients their medication, helping people bathe and get dressed, and serving meals. You may also be required to perform certain housekeeping-related duties, including making beds and clearing the floor of items patients can possibly trip over. They may also assist patients with recreational activities.

Working with psychiatric patients every day, says Learn How to Become, can actually be quite disturbing at times. Since these patients may have a difficult time controlling themselves, workers can be subjected to violent outbursts that include being bitten by patients and even having urine or feces thrown at them.

 

 

OK, so maybe we didn’t spook you that much. If you or your friends have scary jobs, upload a pic and tell us about it on Facebook or Instagram.

–Suzanne and Sanam

 

 

 

Cover photograph used with permission from and gratitude for camila-quintero-franco-mC852jACK1g-unsplash from Unsplash; ghost job from New York Post, fortune teller from hulki-okan-tabak-0EX0Q16ScvY-unsplash, 3D printing from neonbrand-38XhGPwzI3U-unsplash, poison taster from emin-baycan-LV1CxYBgXqU-unsplash, psych ward worker from camila-quintero-franco-_S5N5aAYWNo-unsplash, jack-o-lanterns from david-menidrey-MYRG0ptGh50-unsplash.

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